Sunday, June 21, 2009

One way or another

Last night I lay in bed and fought away tears. My heart was breaking for the little man who now calls me Mommy. We did not become foster parents with the intentions of adopting. We have been asked several times if we are interested in adopting our Lil Man, but we have yet to come up with an answer.

His needs are life long, he may never be able to function as an independent adult. He may grow up and be just fine, as long as he is on medication.

Meeting Lil Man's birth family yesterday was a huge eye opener to me. He has endured so much, but he has come so far. I cannot imagine what condition he would be in if he had been left in the care of his birth Mother. At least now he has a fighting chance.

As of right now we do not want to adopt. We are a young couple who are just starting out. At the same time if we do not adopt him I feel as if we are failing him.

My heart breaks when he asks why he cant go to his "other mama's house" (former foster mother). I cannot imagine him being in someone else home crying out for myself and my husband, and us not being there to comfort him.

We have about a month to make a decision one way or another. Who knew such a lil guy could make such a huge impact.


  1. Hmm... not sure if my other post went through before I closed the window! I just said that I am sorry this is such a difficult decision! Its tough when families never intended to adopt, and then are faced with the choice. I have had some foster parents stay in touch after the child has been placed in a pre-adoptive home. Those families often benefit from someone who has already 'been through it' with the child. And, it lessens the trauma of seperation for the child as well. Just something to think about... you will be in my prayers.

  2. You know, any child born to you could have lifelong problems as well... If God brings you to it He will bring you through it. Looking at the pic above of him kissing you, I think it says it all :). You've been claimed.

  3. While I love the little guy, and he clearly loves me too, we are his foster parents. Our goal is to get his behiavors under control, and to provide him with a stable loving family, until his forever family comes along.